Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions (SPACE)
The Center for Youth Mental Health offers SPACE training for parents and caregivers of children and teens struggling with anxiety, OCD, school refusal, avoidance, or related challenges. SPACE helps parents change how they respond to anxiety so they can support their child without unintentionally strengthening fearful or avoidant patterns.
Here’s how it works:
Notice What Is Getting in the Way
Thoughts, feelings, memories, and body sensations can sometimes pull a young person away from the life they want. The first step is noticing these experiences with curiosity. Rather than judging or immediately trying to remove them, the therapist helps your child recognize what is happening and how avoidance may be limiting school, relationships, confidence, or daily activities.
Step Back From Difficult Thoughts
ACT teaches young people to create space between themselves and difficult thoughts. Instead of treating every thought as a fact or command, they learn to notice it as something the mind is producing. This skill is called cognitive defusion.
Feeling Overwhelmed
“I cannot handle this feeling.”
Reframed:
“I am noticing the thought that I cannot handle this feeling.”
Predicting the Worst
“Something bad is definitely going to happen.”
Reframed:
“My mind is predicting that something bad will happen.”
Waiting to Feel Better
“I have to get rid of this anxiety first.”
Reframed:
“I can make room for anxiety while taking a small step forward.”
Harsh Self-Judgment
“If I make a mistake, I am a failure.”
Reframed:
“I am having a painful thought about failure. It does not define me.”
Connect With Personal Values
ACT helps your child identify the people, activities, qualities, and goals that matter most to them. Values are not rules or achievements. They are directions that can guide choices. A therapist may help your child explore how they want to show up as a friend, student, family member, or individual, even when difficult emotions are present.
Take Committed Action
Once values are clear, your child practices taking small and realistic actions that move toward them. The goal is not to wait until every uncomfortable thought or feeling disappears. Instead, your child learns to make room for discomfort, return attention to the present moment, and choose behaviors that support a meaningful life. Over time, these repeated actions can build confidence, flexibility, and healthier patterns.
Here are some key ACT skills your child will learn:
Acceptance
Learning to make space for difficult emotions, thoughts, and sensations without immediately fighting or avoiding them.
Cognitive Defusion
Stepping back from thoughts and seeing them as mental events rather than facts, rules, or commands.
Present Moment Awareness
Bringing attention back to what is happening now instead of becoming lost in worry, memories, or judgment.
Values Clarification
Identifying the relationships, qualities, and activities that matter most and using them to guide everyday choices.
Committed Action
Taking small, practical steps toward meaningful goals, even when fear, sadness, frustration, or uncertainty is present.
How Can We Help?
If you have questions or would like to make an appointment, please complete this form, and we will get back to you as soon as possible. You can also call our SLO Center at (805) 996-0535 or our Santa Cruz Center at (831) 222-0052.
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